Why Your Team Doesn’t Take You Seriously (And How to Fix It)

Stop Sounding Like You’re Asking for Permission

Most new managers don’t realize their language is holding them back. You can be organized, skilled, and well-intentioned... but if your words sound uncertain, people hesitate to follow. Authority starts in how you communicate.

The most common culprit is the word “just.” “I’m just checking in” sounds innocent, but it shrinks your message. It’s a verbal cushion that makes you sound hesitant. The next time you want an update, remove the filler. Try, “Checking in on the project... where are we at?” It’s respectful but clear. No soft edges, no confusion.

Then there’s the quiet approval-seeker: “Does that make sense?” What your team hears is, “I need you to tell me I didn’t screw this up.” Replace it with, “What questions do you have before we move forward?” or “How does that land on your end?” It changes the energy from self-doubt to leadership alignment.

And finally, “I think we should.” It’s polite, but it sounds like you’re floating a suggestion instead of guiding a team. Replace it with direct statements: “Let’s move forward with this,” or “Here’s the plan I recommend.” That subtle shift moves you from tentative to trustworthy.

Authority isn’t about being loud. It’s about showing clarity when everyone else is uncertain. Your words are the steering wheel of your leadership. Every time you use hesitant language, you let go of that wheel. But when you speak clearly, people lean in. They trust you. They listen. Because you sound like someone who knows where the team is headed... and they want to go there too.